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Quotes
A collection of the best Spike quotes.
School Hard
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"Home Sweet Home."
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"This weekend, the night of St. Vigeous, our power will be at its peak. When I kill her, it'll be the greatest event since the crucifixion. And I should know, I was there." - Minion
"You were there? Oh, please! If every vampire that said he was at the crucifixion was actually there, it would have been like Wood stock." - Spike
"I ought to rip your throat out." - Minion
"I was actually at Wood stock. That was a weird gig. I fed off a flower person and spent the next six hours watching my hand move. So, who do you kill for fun around here?" - Spike
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"Do you know what I find works real good with Slayers? Killing them."
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"Yeah, I did a couple Slayers in my time, I don't like to brag. Who am I kidding, I love to brag!"
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"Me and Dru, we're moving in."
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"Nice work luv." - Spike
"Who are you?" - Buffy
"You'll find out on Saturday." - Spike
"What happens on Saturday?" - Buffy
"I kill you." - Spike
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"Who are you?" - Sheila
"Who do you want me to be?" - Spike
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"all right, I'll go up and get all chanty with the fellas. But you've got to do me one favour. Eat something."
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"What can I say? Couldn't wait."
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"I'm a veil kind of guy. You're too old to eat. But not to kill. I feel better."
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"Slayer! Here kitty, kitty. I find one of your friends first I'm gonna suck 'em dry. And use their bones to bash your head in."
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"Someone's in the ceiling."
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"You think you can fool me? You were my sire, man, you were my Yoda!" - Spike
"Things change." - Angel
"Not us. Not demons. Man, I can't believe this, you Uncle Tom!" - Spike
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"Come on people, this isn't a spectator sport."
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"Fe Fi Fo Fum. I smell the blood of a nice ripe girl."
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"Do we really need weapons for this?" - Buffy
"I just like them. They make me feel more manly." - Spike
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"The last Slayer I killed, she begged for her life. You don't strike me as the begging kind."
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"I'll tell you what. As a personal favour from me to you, I'll make it quick. It won't hurt a bit." - Spike
"No Spike, It's gonna hurt a lot." - Buffy
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"You get the hell away from my daughter." - Joyce
"Women!" - Spike
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"A Slayer with family and friends. That sure as Hell wasn't in the brochure."
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"How's the Annoying One?" - Spike
"He doesn't want to play." - Drusilla
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"I was rash, and if I had to do it all over again...who am I kidding? I'd do it exactly the same, only I'd do this..."
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"From now on we're gonna have a little less ritual and a little more fun around here."
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Halloween
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"Here it comes. Rewind that. Lets see that again."
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"She's tricky. Baby likes to play."
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"You see that? The way she stakes him with that thing? Now that's what I call resourceful. Rewind it again."
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"C'mere poodle."
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"Do you love my insides? The parts you can't see?" - Drusilla
"Eyeballs to entrails my sweet. That's why I gotta study this slayer. Once I know her I can kill her and once I kill her you can have your run of Sunnydale. Get strong again." - Spike
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"Really? Did my pet have a vision?"
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"C'mon talk to daddy. This thing that makes the slayer weak, when is it?"
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"Tomorrows Hallowe'en. Nothing happens on Hallowe'en."
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"Well this is just......neat!"
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"Did you hear that my friends?"
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"Somewhere out here is the tenderest meat you've ever tasted and we have to do is find her first!"
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"Look at you. Shaking. terrified. Alone. Lost little lamb."
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"I love it!"
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Lie To Me
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"The bird's dead Dru. You left in a cage, and you didn't feed it, and now it's all dead, just like the last one."
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"I want to be like you, a vampire." - Ford
"I've known you for 2 minutes and I can't stand you. I don't really feature you living forever. Can I eat him now love?" - Spike
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What's My Line
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"Some people find pain...very inspirational."
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"By George, I think he's got it."
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"What are you going to do with him any ways?" - Willie
"I'm thinking...maybe dinner and a movie. I don't want to rush into anything. I've been hurt, you know." - Spike
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"Another five minutes though, and Angel will be dead, so I forebear. Don't feel too bad for Angel though. He's got something you don't have." - Spike
"What's that?" - Buffy
"Five minutes." - Spike
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Surprise
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"These flowers... are wrong. They're all... wrong! I can't abide them!" - Drusilla
"Let's try something different with the flowers then." - Spike
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"Are you dead set on this, pet? Wouldn't you rather have your party in Vienna?" - Spike
"But the invitations are sent." - Drusilla
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"It will be the best party ever." - Drusilla
"Why's that?" - Spike
"Because it will be the last." - Drusilla
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"Yeah...that'll work. Now say pretty please."
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"Uh, you're not clear on the concept pal, there is no instead, just first and second."
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"What's that mate?" - Spike
"You two stink of humanity. You share affection and jealousy." - Judge
"Yeah, what of it?" - Spike
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"What's Big Blue doing anyway?" - Spike
"I am preparing." - Judge
"It's interesting to me that preparing looks a great bit like sitting on your ass." - Spike
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Innocence
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"I'm naming all the stars." - Drusilla
"You can't see the stars love, that's the ceiling, also, it's day. " - Spike
"I can see them. But I've named them all the same name. And there's terrible confusion." - Drusilla
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Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered
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"Fancy it pet?" - Spike
"Ohh, it's beautiful." - Drusilla
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Passion
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"Dear Buffy, I'm still trying to decide the best way to send my regards." - Angelus
"Why don't you rip out her lungs? That might make an impression" - Spike
"Lacks...poetry." - Angelus
"It doesn't have to. What rhymes with 'lungs'?" - Spike
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"Are you insane? We're supposed to kill the bitch, not leave gag gifts in her friends' beds."
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"If you ask me, I find myself preferring the Buffy whipped Angelus. This new and improved one is not playing with a full sack. I like a good slaughter as much as the next block. But his pranks will only leave us with one incredibly brassed off slayer."
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I Only Have Eyes For You
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"It's paradise. Big windows, lovely gardens. It'll be perfect when we want the sunlight to kill us."
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"Try to have fun without me." - Angelus
"Oh I will. Sooner than you think." - Spike
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"You might want to let up. They say when you've drawn blood, you've exfoliated."
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Becoming
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"What did the Moon tell you? Did you have a vision? Is something coming?" - Angelus
"Oh, yeah. Something terrible. Psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst..." - Drusilla
"Where?" - Angelus
"At the museum. A tomb... with a surprise inside." - Drusilla
"You can see all that in your head?" - Angelus
"No, you ninny. She read it in the morning paper." - Spike
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"It's a big rock. I can't wait to tell my friends. They don't have a rock this big."
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"Someone wasn't worthy."
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"Hey! White flag here. I quit." - Spike
"Let me clear this up for you. We're mortal enemies. We don't get time-outs." - Buffy
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"I want to save the world." - Spike
"Okay, you do remember you're a vampire, right?" - Buffy
"We like to talk big. Vampires do. 'I'm going to destroy the world.' That's just tough guy talk. Strutting around with your friends over a pint of blood. The truth is, I like this world. You've got... dog racing, Manchester United. And you've got people. Billions of people walking around like Happy Meals with legs. It's all right here. But then someone comes along with a vision. With a real... passion for destruction. Angel could pull it off. Goodbye, Picadilly. Farewell, Leicester Bloody Square. You know what I'm saying?" - Spike
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"All right, talk." - Buffy
"First I'm going to kill him." - Spike
"Ahem!" - Buffy
"Oh, right." - Spike
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"You want to go around, pet, I'll have a gay old time of it. You want to stop Angel... we're gonna have to play this a bit differently."
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"What are you talking about?" - Buffy
"I'm talking about your ex, pet. I'm talking about putting him in the bloody ground." - Spike
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"I lost a friend tonight..." - Buffy
"I wasn't in on that raiding party." - Spike
"...and I may lose more. The whole earth may be sucked into Hell, and you want my help 'cause your girlfriend's a big ho? Well, let me take this opportunity to not care." - Buffy
"I can't fight them both alone, and neither can you!" - Spike
"I hate you." - Buffy
"And I'm all you've got." - Spike
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"What, your Mom doesn't know?" - Spike
"Know what?" - Joyce
"That I'm, uh...in a band. A rock band...with Spike here." - Buffy
"Right. She plays the-the triangle..." - Spike
"...Drums." - Buffy
"Drums, yeah. She's hell on the old skins, you know." - Spike
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"Have we met?" - Joyce
"You hit me with an ax one time. Remember? Uh, 'Get the hell away from my daughter!'" - Spike
"Oh. So, do you, uh, live here in town?" - Joyce
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"There's no deal without Dru." - Spike
"She killed Kendra." - Buffy
"Dru bagged a slayer? She didn't tell me. Good for her. But not from your perspective, I suppose." - Spike
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"You have your way with him, you'll never get to destroy the world. And I don't fancy spending the next month trying to get librarian out of the carpet."
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"Uh, Drusilla..." - Spike
"Honey..." - Angelus
"We are finished here, ducks." - Spike
"Sorry. I was in the moment." - Drusilla
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"Painful, isn't it?"
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"I don't want to hurt you, baby. (He decks Drusilla) Doesn't mean I won't."
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Lover's Walk
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"She just left. She didn't even care enough to cut off my head or
set me on fire. (sniffs) I mean, is that too much to ask? You know? Some
little sign that she cared?He pauses for a moment to inhale and exhale deeply.
Spike: It was that truce with Buffy that did it. Dru said I'd gone
soft. Wasn't demon enough for the likes of her. And I told her it didn't
mean anything, I was thinking of her the whole time, but she didn't
care. So, we got to Brazil, and she was... she was just different. I
gave her everything: Beautiful jewels, beautiful dresses with beautiful
girls in them, but nothing made her happy. And she would fliiirt!
(sniffs) I caught her on a park bench, making out with a *chaos* demon!
Have you ever seen a chaos demon? They're all slime and antlers. They're
disgusting."
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"So I'm strolling through the park, looking for a meal, and I
happen to walk by, and she's making out with the chaos demon! And so I
said, 'You know, I don't have to put up with this.' And she said,
'Fine!' So I said, 'Fine, do whatever you like!' I mean, I thought we
were going to make up, you know." - Spike
"Well, she sounds very unreasonable." - Joyce
"She is. She's out of her mind. (sniffs) That's what I miss most
about her." - Spike
"Well, Spike, sometimes even when two people seem right for each
other, their lives just take different paths. When Buffy's father and I... " - Joyce
"No, this is different. Our love was eternal.
Literally. (calms down) You got any of those little marshmallows?" - Spike
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"Spike." - Angel
"Oh, my God. Get out of here!" - Joyce
"Yeah. You're not invited." - Spike
"He's crazy. He'll kill us." - Joyce
"Not while I breathe. Well, actually, I don't breathe." - Spike
"Joyce, listen to me." - Angel
"You get out of this house, or I will stake you myself." - Joyce
"You're a very bad man." - Spike
"Joyce, you can't trust him. Invite me in." - Angel
"You touch her, and I'll cut your head off!" - Angel
"Yeah? You and what army?" - Spike
"That would be me." - Buffy
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"What do you know? It's your fault, the both of you! She belongs with me. (sobs) I'm nothing without her." - Spike
"That I'll have to agree with. You're pathetic, you know that?You're not even a loser anymore, you're a shell of a loser." - Buffy
"Yeah. You're one to talk." - Spike
"Meaning?" - Buffy
"The last time I looked in on you two, you were
fighting to the death. Now you're back making googly-eyes at each other
like nothing happened. Makes me want to heave. Oh, yeah. You're just friends.
You're *not* friends. You'll never be friends.
You'll be in love till it kills you both. You'll fight, and you'll shag,
and you'll hate each other till it makes you quiver, but you'll never be
friends. (points at his temple) Love isn't brains, children, it's
blood... (clasps his chest) blood screaming inside you to work its will.
*I* may be love's bitch, but at least *I'm* man enough to admit it." - Spike
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The Harsh Light Of Day
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Into The Dark
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"How can I thank you, you mysterious black-clad hunk of a night thing? No need little lady. Your tears of gratitude are enough for me. You see, I was once a bad-ass vampire. But love, and a pesky curse, defanged me. And now I'm just a big fluffy puppy with bad teeth. No, not the hair! Never the hair! But there must be some way I can show my appreciation? No! Helping those in need's my job. And working up a load of sexual tension, and prancing away like a magnificent pouf is truly thanks enough. I understand. I have a nephew who's gay, so... Say no more! Evil's still afoot, and I'm almost out of that Nancy-boy hair gel I like so much. Quickly! To the Angel mobile! Away!"
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"Bloody Hell woman, you're cutting off my circulation." - Spike
"You don't have any circulation." - Buffy
"Well, it pinches." - Spike
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"You won, all right! You came in, and you killed them, and you took their land. That's what conquering nations do. It's what Caesar did, and he's not going around saying "I came, I conquered, I feel really bad about it". The history of the world is not people making friends. You had better weapons and you massacred them, end of story."
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This Year's Girl
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Who Are You
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Superstar
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Where The Wild Things Are
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New Moon Rising
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The Yoko Factor
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Primeval
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Restless
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Buffy V Dracula
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Real Me
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The Replacement
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Out Of My Mind
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No Place Like Home
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Family
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Fool For Love
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Shadow
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Listening To Fear
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Into The Woods
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Triangle
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Checkpoint
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Blood Ties
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Crush
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I Was Made To Love You
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The Body
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Forever
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Intervention
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Tough Love
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Spiral
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